Fork Milk Kidnap Review

Hoo boy, this is a tough game to review on a family friendly channel! Fork Milk Kidnap is a game for 3-10 players, age 17 and older. Can’t stress that enough, this one’s for the very big kids only.

Every player is handed an A, B, and C card, plus a 1,2 and 3 token. In the middle, set the 123 and ABC cards side by side with two cards worth of space between them. Each round, one player will draw three black action cards and line them up by 1 2 and 3, and three blue object cards, doing the same by A B and C. Every player must decide which action they would perform to which object. Sort your tiles face down next to your ABC cards, and then, once everyone is ready, go around the circle and reveal your answers. No need to do so simultaneously. In fact, it’s more fun to make everyone justify their choices in the hot seat. Well, fun for everyone except the person answering! Document the answer patterns, any players who match all three answer pairings, and form a majority, score one point. If there’s a tie for matches, both groups earn a point. The first to 5 points wins. Since there are 200 action and object cards each, the number of possible combinations strain the mind! Unless you’re a math major or something…nerd.

When playing Fork Milk Kidnap, one must run the delicate tightrope of balancing common decency with novel thinking. Do you answer what you think the reasonable combination will be, or do you stick to your guns and be honest, knowing your sense to be of the sense-iest…sensibilities. Of course, if you’re here for a fun time, not a long time, go ahead and create the most debaucherous answer imaginable, ya freak. We see you there, staring from beyond the fourth wall. We see your heart. Y’er twisted, buddy.