My children have this knack for knowing the exact moment my thoughts have come into focus. Since becoming a mom, I’m not going to lie, I walk around in a hazy fog about 90% of the time. In fact, I think it’s incredibly likely that my mommy brain is significantly worse now that my kids are a bit older and a lot more independent.
Why is that?
Probably because I’ve tricked myself into thinking that I can take on more and that I should be taking on more nowadays. If you were to climb into my head right now, you’d find those never ending lists that come part and parcel with being the M-O-M of a household. In addition, you’d find all the extra stuff I’ve felt guilted/lead/inspired/required to take on now that my kids are oh so grown up and oh so independent (for the record, they are ages 3 and 5). Of course, none of it is organized. It’s all a mess. A jumbled mess.
When I’m the Working Mom, I’m thinking about the kids. When I’m the Playing with the Kids mom, I’m thinking about work. When I’m the Cooking Dinner Mom…Oh wait, I’m not sure where that mom disappeared to? I digress. Like I said, my kids just seem to intuitively know the exact moment that clarity hits like a ton of bricks. “Oh that’s what I said I needed to do!” *Smacks Face*
Then it happens…
At that exact moment, someone is thirsty. At that exact moment, someone needs to go to the potty. At that exact moment, someone falls and scrapes their knee. At that exact moment, they need me.
What do I do?
Aren’t they a bit older and aren’t they supposed to be more independent now? I took on more because they needed me less! Right? Who will I let down by tending to their needs instead of the needs of my readers, or my husband, or the PR company on the other end of the email? Will I lose a reader? Will I disappoint an advertiser? Will the house be a wreck when my husband gets home?
The more important question is who will I let down by not tending to their needs. They might be older. They might be slightly more independent. I might be right, and now might be a season in my life where taking on more makes sense. They need me though. They are more important than any email, any post, any deal and definitely more important than my social media addiction!
What do I do?
I jot down a note as detailed as I can (if I have time!) to try and remind myself of the brilliance that struck during that rare moment of clarity, and I head off to be Mom. Just Mom. It’s truly the best job ever.