Barbie Takes Another Hit—Insanity Rules

For years, girls have projected their fantasies on that beautifully designed lump of plastic called Barbie—just as neurotic adults have projected their unresolved issues and fears on her. Barbie is a cultural icon, and it’s easy to attack her, and media eats that up. But in the latest attack on the 51-year-old star, clarity of thought has been chucked, insanity rules, and the only response is a wide-eyed OMG, as they say in text-speak.

A widely reported internal FBI memo last week said that the popular, and mostly sold-out Barbie Video Girl doll from Mattel is a “possible child pornography production method.”

This is so patently ridiculous that it’s hard to comprehend. This would be completely laughable if it didn’t represent the twisted, “worst first” thinking pervading our culture. Despite statistics to the contrary, the assumption is that our children are in danger from predators 24/7.  Statistics aside, can anyone really think that a doll is going to turn someone into a person who takes advantage of children? Idiotic as it is, the answer is seemingly yes.

Think about this in rational terms: The FBI (Your tax dollars at work!) is making the assumption that someone would buy this $50 doll to harm kids. Really? You can get better video on a cell phone, if it came to that, and wouldn’t a grown man (We always assume it’s men.) holding up a doll and filming kids be, oh I don’t know, just a teensy bit conspicuous?

This is imagination run riot in the most pernicious, intellectually bankrupt way, focusing on impossible “what if’s” with no connection to “what is.”

You know who really scares me in this, though? The real perv in the Sacramento Field Office of the FBI who thought this up and then convinced his or her superiors that this was a legitimate concern. That’s one dangerous, deluded person.

The only bright spot in this is that little girls who love Barbie won’t see the media that’s run this story and so they’re free to do what they do—love Barbie and let their vibrant imaginations bring her to life in the context of their healthy play.

The rest of these people should get a grip.

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